Head Strokes and TLC

There is a specific way she used to stroke my head as I fell asleep. It is incredibly hard to describe but embedded in my memory, her signature head stroke. I was praying bedtime prayers tonight with Liliana and stroking her head in that exact way. It was so blissful for me when my Mama did it, and my fingers naturally stroke her hair like that. She sighed contentedly and her little eyelids fluttered closed.

Was she not so beautiful? She still is!

She did many little things. These are the things that stand out in my memory. "One Tin Soldier" as a bedtime song, nivea on my dry cheeks, love notes in my lunch box, picnics in the school yard. In her memory she made many mistakes. She is so humble and detailed that she will call me on the phone to this day and apologize for something she did in my childhood that she thinks could be making me sad!

Guess what? They don't stand out in my mind. Those little, beautiful acts of detailed love that inspire me in my daily mothering....those are what stand out to me. I knew, absolutely, unshakeably, irrevocably that I was loved beyond measure and without qualification.

Something is becoming abundantly clear to me, and it is that those tiny little details can be the ones that take the most effort. Because, as a Mama, after the normal daily tasks have been accomplished, it takes monumental effort sometimes to linger a little longer and sing one more song or stroke someones blond head for 3 more minutes. It takes monumental effort to put aside the to-do list and read one more story or play pretend. That middle of the night glass of water and tummy rubs....so little, just a few minutes, big effort. These little things make a huge impact, more than any short tempered or impatient moment could.

This gives me so much hope. My patience seems short these days and my nighttime wakings are often full of feelings of remorse over moments where I was harsh or lacking mercy in my discipline. Yet, when I think about how my own mother loved me and the memories that stand out as strong and clear as if they were yesterday....it is the delicate, detailed, little ways in which she loved me exactly how I needed to be loved.

My silly mini-Me and her funny fashion sense!

I pray one day my Liliana finds herself stroking someones head - be it a friend, daughter, husband, patient - and smiling over the way her fingers know exactly what to do just like her mama did. May I take enough moments to love her in small and detailed ways that she is inspired to find the energy to do the same....

May you be blessed!

Tender Hearted Little Man

It seems to me that anytime I write about a certain way one of my children is behaving, something changes. This is in the endearing things and the maddening things. When we are suffering because a child is cranky, sick, or fighting sleep I know that quickly this will pass. This is also the way with cute little quirks or obsessions. 

Judah in particular has gone through a series of obsessions. First he was obsessed with his stuffies, then his basketballs, and now his baby. Or, as he says it, "my little baby." This sweet boy won't go anywhere or do anything without his little baby. Sometimes when we are going out I insist on putting her clothes on because she is soooo grimy from love! When we go to the mall or for groceries he would prefer to push her in the stroller (which is pink). He is such a darling looking little boy that even in the most boyish of attire people comment that "she is so cute!"Kudos to Joe for having no issues that his little man is so tender hearted towards his little baby. We'll come across him bouncing her and shh-shh-shhing her. Truly, it is heart melting. This little boy is such a sweetheart! 

When little baby comes with us in the car she rides in her stroller and Judah holds the handle as tight as can be so she doesn't slide anywhere. We looked back one day to see him utterly out cold but with no more loose of a grip on his baby. 

Oh, how you make me smile, my tender hearted little man!

St. Patrick's Day and the Day It All Began (Officially)

St. Patrick's day is tomorrow, but these next few days are going to be incredibly busy! Joe and his high school boys team have made the provincial championships, so in a couple hours the four of us trek to Pincher Creek Alberta to coach (him) and cheer (us). Which means that we won't have much time for St. Paddy's day celebrations other than some rousing "Go Go Gos".

Mach 17th is one of those days that holds a beautiful, happy, lifelong memory for me. 7 years ago, when St. Patrick's day rolled around, Joe and I had been spending as many hours each day as we could together and yet we weren't "official." This was despite the fact that he had already told me that he was going to marry me, and I believed him! I mean seriously, he is so creative and he did so many beautiful romantic things for me. He was very intent on wooing! One in particular that stands out is a picnic in the woods that he planned. He tricked me into walking that way with a friend, and before I knew it there was a path of candles and rocks in heart shapes leading me to a picnic nestled in the woods and a bouquet of wild flowers. My Joe, he always does things a little unconventionally, but always so beautifully.

Being the romantic that he is, he wanted to do things the old fashioned way and seal the deal that we were going "steady". He had been promising me for weeks that he would teach me how to pitch. I didn't know anything about baseball prior to meeting Joe, but as he was pitching for the varsity team I sure spent many hours getting to know the game very quickly! I was so fascinated by all of the different pitches. Being the clueless Canadian that I was, I thought the pitcher just threw the ball as fast as he could as straight as he could. Silly me!

Joe asked me, after his game on St. Patrick's day if I wanted to play catch! He taught me a curve ball, slider, and change up. Of course, I kept throwing the ball everywhere but to his glove. One of the times that he was chasing after one of my wild throws he switched the ball we were using and passed me a ball on which he had written, "will you be my girlfriend?"

Of course I swooned at the cheesiness and leaped in his arms and kissed his face and said YES!

I think that falling in love should be cheesy. There is enough time to be serious in life, so if you are reading this and falling-in-love with your forever Love has not yet happened to you, when it does, allow yourself to fall hard and be cheesy. Don't hold back, because the farther you fall the deeper your conviction of love will be, even on the days when love doesn't feel easy.

So, Happy St. Patrick's day to all of you, dear ones! May your day be blessed with abundant joy!