Judah David Turns One

I woke up this morning and glanced over at the little person next to me. With his round face, curly blond hair, long eyelashes, and cheeks flushed with sleep he looked so precious. I wanted to pull him into me and cover his little face with kisses. I remembered the morning, just one year ago, waking up to the tiny swaddled bundle next to me and having the same sentiment of overwhelming love. How is it, handsome son of ours, that you are already one year old?

"Um Mama, there is a problem here, and it is that I am not in your arms!"

We celebrated your birthday last night with a simple but fun family dinner. Big sister and I had such a fun time decorating the house in dinosaurs and scurrying about trying to get everything clean. We kept saying to you, "this is how much we love you, Judah!" as we mopped the floor and dusted everywhere. Of course, you were in your favourite place, my arms, as I scrubbed. You've mastered the art of clinging to me and lifting your legs high off the ground if I try to set you down. It sure is exhausting toting you around, but it makes my heart so full having your little self stuck to me.

 We had such a happy night celebrating your life. Looking around the room at all of the joy filled faces, it became so apparent to me (yet again) that even though the first year of your life was a very helpless year, the gift you gave to those around you by your very presence was above and beyond what we were able to give you. You made our hearts stretch and grow, you challenged our generosity, loved unconditionally, forgave instantly, infused joy into every circumstance despite how difficult it was. You, Judah David, are such a gift to us and to the world. Thank you!

"This is totally not as fun as you told me it'd be, mama!"

A perfect new toy from Grandad and Lolli!

Eyes of love for Lolli

There are so many things I want to remember about you this year. I just can't get enough of your beautiful little self - your incredible facial expressions, the way you start dancing anytime music hits your ears, how you absolutely adore your big sister, your ravenous appetite, the way you curl up close to us when you are sleeping and don't let go, and your intense need to hold onto anything that looks like a stick.

"What in heavens name is happening here?" 

"Oh, this is what all that hubbub was about...ok, very worth it!"

You are, in every way, so loveable and so loved. Thank you, dearest son, for everything that you are. We are so excited to see the ways in which you grow this year! You can already, among other things, say mama, dada, Liliana, and alleluia (who would have thought!). You are so very close to walking, and you stand at the window several times each day screeching to be let loose outside. You absolutely love putting straws in lids, caps on containers, blocks on top of each other. You are such a joy, Judah, we love you so much!

We are humbled and grateful that we have been entrusted the gift of beautiful little you to teach, protect, and guide towards heaven. Happy Birthday, Critter.

Love always Mama, Daddy, and Liliana

Remembering....

Remembering, with a slightly achy but joyfully overflowing heart....

- feverishly keeping our home clean as we waited with baited breath for our son. A nightly vacuum and mop, scrubbed counters, clutter gone, towels piled and the pool blown up downstairs, a teensy hat set aside

- holding my sweet daughter a little closer knowing that soon she would be a big sister and that the simplicity of our days as a family of three would be changed

- talking to our unborn baby every night telling him how we couldn't wait to meet him

- looking at my big belly in the mirror and dreaming of the teeny person inside, not knowing what he looked like or who he would be, and wondering if I'd ever look or feel like myself again (if I'm being entirely honest!)

- the first flutters of excitement in my heart when I thought "today might be the day!"

- sending L out the door to her grandparents and wishing I could snatch her up and hold her forever

- dancing in the dark kitchen through contractions, telling our boy I loved him and that he was very safe

- feeling utterly and perfectly connected to my handsome husband as we awaited our babe together and he anticipated my every need

- a flurry of excitement when our midwives arrived, midnight, snow falling, baby coming SOON

- the intense, utter, gut wrenching, life changing love I had for our son the moment I scooped him up out of the water and held him in my arms

- the sweet sounds newborn Judah made - no crying or screaming, just darling little 'bleating' noises

- being unable to sleep that night....tucked in bed by our midwives after a glass of champagne and piece of banana bread....he's mine? he's ours? how is this possible? how are we so blessed?

"Before you were conceived, I wanted you. Before you were born, I loved you. Before you were here an hour, I would die for you. This is the miracle of love.” (Maureen Hawkins)

I can't believe our sweet Judah is 1 year old in just two days. Where has the year gone? 

xoxo

Liliana turns 3

Our sweet little girl turned 3 one week ago. Liliana, how is it possible that you are 3?

As I sit here writing you play around me in an imaginary world, with a pot lid for a shield and a spatula for a sword. You already have a dress on, as you would live in those if you could.

The morning of your birthday...a princess tiara and a pirate sword (this combination perfectly describes you!)

We are in this funny place where you are simultaneously so sweet and so feisty...it is the age of you discovering your own will and trying to enforce it, while we help you discover how to do so with respect and with healthy boundaries.

Your birthday day was so fun! You woke up so very excited, aware from the first moment that IT WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY. Your eyes shone with excitement and anticipation. It is the first year you have been old enough to do this. We had chocolate chip pancakes and bacon for breakfast (your favorite), and steak and pasta (your request) with some veggies (mama's requirement) for dinner with our family all gathered around.

Opening a present from Nonna and Papa!

A new Lottie Doll (a great toy for any Mamas reading!)

With beloved Uncle Vince who THOUGHTFULLY
bought you the beautiful dress you have on!

A strong Daddy who loves you so well!

You spent most of your birthday helping me scrub and cook to host our family for dinner, but I felt as though it maybe wasn't such a bad lesson to learn...that our hearts are most fulfilled when we give, rather than receive. Of course, your 3 year old self LOVED receiving presents.

As I looked at you, my sweet girl, revelling in birthday celebrations that night, I marvelled at your inner and outer beauty.

My darling, you are so beautiful!

You have a sweet voice, kind heart, inquisitive mind, feisty spirit, sense of adventure, love of creatures, need to cuddle, tender way...you captivate and amaze us with your beauty. We want you to remember always how beautiful and what a gift you are!

"Beautiful. A work of art - full of life, exploding with a unique, dynamic, vibrant energy.

Beautiful. Eyes like the morning, a strong and powerful spirit, a face that brims with joy and hope. Beautiful because you were formed by God. Beautiful because He has known you since before you even existed. He has loved you since the beginning of time. Beautiful because you're real, beautiful because you ARE." (Matt Walsh)

Chocolate cupcakes with strawberry icing (flavored and coloured
with REAL strawberries!) YUMMY!!

Sweet girl with your big bow (of course your choice
for hair accessory!)

I love you so, my lovely little lady!

We praise our good God for the gift of YOU, Liliana Joy., In this year that has passed you have only continued to make the lives of all who meet you more rich and more joy-filled. Your middle name couldn't be more perfect. We pray that you continue to know Jesus' love for you through how we love you.

We love you so much, our darling sweet girl.

Winter Days and Reason to Give Thanks

Dearest Loved Ones,

How blessed we are! It has been a beautiful and BUSY time in our lives. I sometimes find myself wishing everything would slow down so that we could enjoy the scenery a little more, but then I realize that this is life, and chances are it won't slow down so we need to learn to appreciate the scenery in each moment despite the pace of life. So, here is a little update for all of our dear ones far away.

First of all, yesterday was the first day of winter. At times we just feel upside down and backwards, it is hard to adjust to the words "June" and "winter" being synonymous. I don't know if I would ever get used to such things, as my memories of June- August are filled with such beautiful summer events and childhood joy! Beautifully, though, the last two days have been gloriously sunny and I just LOVE being able to turn my face to the sun and soak up some of the rays. It has been too long since we've seen sunshine. It will be fun to tell Liliana that she was a winter baby, even though probably for the rest of her life she'll have summer birthdays.

I had a wonderful 26th Birthday. Joe and I were spoiled to be invited over for dinner on my birthday-eve by our parish priest, Fr. David. He served us a gorgeous Italian meal, complete with fresh bread, 3 courses, and gorgeous dessert. Joe even got to indulge in some home made limoncello!!! The next day, I spoiled myself with a french manicure and gorgeous fresh baked scones from the bakery. I've wanted them every time I walked past the bakery but was able to hold out until my birthday, it was such a treat! Joe stayed in with me that night and we cooked a beautiful meal, it was a blessing to just "be" with no where to go or no schedule to keep. Finally, on Friday we went bowling with our friends Leigh and Karli...and let's just say I felt like the comic relief trying to bowl around my big belly. We had to put up the bumpers, I was a lost cause. However, fun fun FUN!

Yesterday we "entertained" for the first time in our little apartment. I felt nervous all week about it, because of course I would like to be the "hostess with the mostest" and it is hard to accomplish when you make your guests eat on the floor around the coffee table due to lack of space! Joe and I cooked Mexican food, which involved a trip to the only Latino grocer I could find online. Get this, Goya black beans are priced like a delicacy here, but mmmmm they were so worth it! It's been almost a year since we've been able to eat delicious black beans. Seeing the delicious chalupa sauces and varieties of salsas almost made me feel at home. Anyhow, all worked out and no one seemed to mind too much having to sit on the floor. It was balm for the heart to be able to do something nice for people, when most often here we are the recipients of overwhelming hospitality and generosity.

Our little person is getting not-so-little and I am getting both antsy and nervous about how quickly her "guess date" is approaching! I am so in love with this little lady and find every single movement she makes soooo endearing. I've been spending lots of time trying to encourage her into the proper anterior position for birth, which means lots of time leaning forward so that she doesn't decide to flip around. I am excited about the possibility of a smooth and straightforward delivery...needless to say encouraging her to be back-to-my-belly-button has also alleviated lots of back pain. We both win!! I have found myself truly able to bond with her this pregnancy, which I feel very blessed to have. So looking forward to the first moment I can look at her little face and tell her "hi, I am your mama!!!!"

Have I mentioned how much I love my husband? Haha, oh yes, I suppose that is almost the topic of every blog so I won't nauseate you with gushy-ness this blog. Needless to say, he is still working hard and continues to grow as a hero in my eyes. 'sigh!'

Well, I will leave it there for now. We are so blessed, GOD is so GOOD, and His Providence continues to amaze and humble us. We miss you all, my heart aches for missing the beautiful spring days and time with our dear families. Know we keep close to you in thoughts and prayer,

Love always,