Saturday, March 18, 2017

Loving Lately

Lately we are relishing a slow but steady return to normal after sickness, death, weddings, funerals, hospitalizations, and bad bugs!

There are a few things about these days that I want to hold close to my heart forever...

Is it tomorrow? Almost daily Judah asks me if it is tomorrow. I always respond with the same, "no my darling, it is today." "Oh GOOD," he always says. I'm not sure what it is about tomorrow that he is not so sure about, but I love that he is always so thrilled that it is today. Talk about being grateful for the moment!

Working out with Daddy, one of his current favorite activities

Bedtime and our big boy. Judah had the nightly habit of a trip to our bedroom for some snuggles with mama around 2 am. Unfortunately because my belly is getting so big and thinking ahead to cosleeping we knew it had to end. We set up a mattress next to Joe's side of the bed so that if he felt the need he still was welcome. However he has decided he prefers to stay in his own bed all night rather than be relegated to the floor. I can't help but feel a little heartbroken that our nightly snuggles ended, just like that, but I more in awe of his determination. Every night his little lips quiver as he expresses that it is hard to stay in his own bed. Every night I reassure him that he can call me if he needs me. Every morning he wakes up feeling so incredibly victorious. We cover him in kisses and hugs and tell him he is so brave and strong. He feels like a million bucks!

Such a sweet view....matching bedhead! Maybe that's why I feel so sad that this time has come to an end :(
Our animal and fact lover. Liliana has always had a heart for animals, and lately she has become even more interested in facts about them. She would pick Planet Earth or the Wild Kratts over any other show, and then thrills us with her facts and dreams. She had to give a presentation about what she wanted to be when she grew up  and she told the whole school she would be a dog walker, or maybe someone who studies rare birds. So funny! When I am not sleeping well she tells me I am like a nocturnal animal, and is quite fascinated with the circle of life and the food chain. It is awesome to see her little brain working and growing and making connections!

She is so colorful! 

Sacrifice and Acts of Love Jar. For Lent we put a jar in the middle of the table and when the children choose to make a sacrifice (like eating a vegetable they don't love without complaining), or extraordinary act of love (like offering to do a task that isn't usually theirs), they put a dried bean in the jar. The Easter Bunny will turn those beans into jelly beans and then they can eat a jelly bean over the Easter season whenever they do a sacrifice or act of love. It has been beautiful to witness them trying to find ways to add beans to the jar. Just this week I was treated to both a salon experience and a foot massage. I didn't anticipate this would benefit me so hugely ;)

Two little foot rubbers, 100% their idea!
Lent. Every lent leaves me grateful for the Divine Psychiatrist and this season of simplicity, sacrifice, and honesty with self. Being very pregnant my lenten commitments are simple, but involve digging into the recesses of our pantry and fridge, cooking simply and with what we have as opposed to spending more, and healthy basic meals for our family. I can see that everyone is thriving, and as we live Lent well we eagerly anticipate the celebration of Easter and our Tiny Darling's birthday!

Lenten work, changing things around and making room for Tiny Baby

A lenten lunch for my man, egg salad sandwich in a jar :) Yum!!
Spring. As I write I hear our sweeties outside the OPEN window! It is only just above 10 degrees but they are in shorts and rubber boots, looking like little wild things, dirty and so happy. It has been a long, cold, wet winter and the signs of Spring absolutely gladden the heart and lift the soul. There will be some pretty significant spring clean up to do in our yard as it seems most of our solar lanterns and much of our grass did not survive the winter. That is happy work though.

I will leave it at that so I can go watch Liliana and Judah playing through the window. Does anyone else absolutely love watching their children play? Their imaginations are amazing!

Maybe it is because Daddy has such a huge imagination....dress up tea party, of course his idea!

Lots of love,

Sunday, January 8, 2017

The Heroic Hour

These days, especially 6 months pregnant, it is quite astonishing at just how deep I have to dig to end the day well for our children. They say that the heroic hour is when the alarm goes off. I experience that it takes very little heroism on my part to roll out of bed towards the first sip of coffee and some quiet prayer time before the day. On the other hand, it takes some serious guts to tuck my darlings in having accomplished clean teeth and bodies, sincere prayer, quality reading, and loving caresses with whispered affirmations of their beauty, value, and worth in the eyes of God their Father and me their mama.

Judah also finds bedtime the heroic hour, ergo his arsenal carefully tucked into his pullup :)

I firmly desire that, no matter how difficult little or big moments of the day are, my children drift to sleep having just heard that they are precious, worthy, and so treasured by myself and their Daddy.

A few days ago I sat beside their bed holding little hands in one hand and my head in the other. We had battled to get through the day, and I felt like I had nothing left to give. I could tell, by looking over at Joe, that he also had given almost everything he had to give to his intense day of work and tired demanding children at the end of it.

I could not help it as tears of weariness ran down my cheeks and onto my lap. Oh how I love them, oh how full of needs they are, oh how lacking I am. 

As I sat there quietly sniffling and not trying to alert my sensitive darlings to the fact that Mommy was crying (which to them is like the world ending!), I realized yet again the gift of parenthood. It is deeply humbling and reminds me so frequently that on my own I am not sufficient. Grace, grace, grace....but for the grace of God. 

Perhaps we all have a heroic hour? That one part of our day where we have to dig deepest and cry out most fervently for grace and strength. For me it is most certainly the bed time hour. Yet, just one short hour later as I sneak in  to kiss little cheeks one more time and tuck blankets around little bodies my heart cannot help but break with love and thanksgiving.

Sometimes sister is the best solution for a pillow and a rest. I can't wait to see one more little person in that snuggle! 

May you find the grace and strength you need for your own heroic hour!

Tuesday, January 3, 2017

Snowy Fun

I've always thought that the key to surviving wintery weather is to have fun IN it! Budgetary constraints have meant that so far skiing is not an option, but this Christmas we had the best time learning to skate! We also tried out a sledding hill scouted by Uncle Steven that was the shortest but steepest hill the kids have ever tobagganed on. It was so steep, in fact, that Liliana only had to slide on her bum to go at warp speed. A few videos for the memory bank!

With love,