Moments of Grace: The Mirror

There is an inevitable scenario each morning as I try to get myself ready. Sliiiiiiiide pitter patter pitter patter....I hear the sound of two sets of little feet pushing two stools over the hardwood floor to the bathroom where I rush through my morning "beauty" routine. Giggles and screeches, pointing and pushing, these four little arms, legs, eyes, ears and two little mouths, noses, and hearts imitate my every move. They brush their teeth, Liliana pretends to curl her eyelashes and Judah tries to stick bobby pins in his ears thinking they are q-tips. Judah draws eyeliner on his cheek and Liliana takes my brush blush, feeling so grown up as she swipes it across her cheeks. She uncaps my deodorant and swipes it across her tummy under her shirt, he takes it from her and rubs it on his cheeks. My hands fly from preventing several small disasters, to slapping on a bit of makeup, to hurriedly brushing my teeth, flipping my head over and throwing in a quick bun, and back to preventing more disaster.

One morning this past week I left the bathroom and realized I hadn't looked in the mirror! I had no idea if my hurried attempt at being "put together" had indeed achieved such an effect!

I used to look in the mirror too much, analyzing every angle, critiquing, pinching, obsessing and loathing.

I laughed as I realized that this is another gift of love....to love my Loves so deeply and so wholly and with such intensity that I forget to look in a mirror. There are far more important things to tend to than analyzing what can't be changed.

However, as I thought about it more I realized something even better....that these Loves of mine have become my mirror. The only mirror that matters.

My husband is my mirror as he gazes at me over the candles at dinner while our children make messes and he knows I am tired. He shows me that I am appreciated, that my work matters, it has been well done, and I am captivating to him even with smudges of dinner's preparations on my shirt and my bun turned lopsided over a day of chasing littles.

Oh wife, you silly woman! I will ALWAYS love you!

He thinks I am beautiful, and enough, and on top of it he is studly :)

My nursing babes are my mirror as they gaze at my with utter adoration while they suckle. When I look away their little hands creep up to cup my cheek and draw my gaze back to them. They show me that I am needed, and irreplaceable, and perfect for them.

He always wants to hold my hands as he sleeps!

My toddler is my mirror as she laughs over my crazy dancing in the kitchen or runs to me the second she needs anything. She is my mirror when tells me over and over again that I am sooooo pretty and stubbornly insists that her outfit be exactly like mine. She is my mirror when my harsh words or my sad mood make her sad and anxious. She tells me that I am beautiful, but imperfect, and yet, always worthy of forgiveness.

She felt so special that night, just like Mama!

The most perfect mirror. 

My friends are my mirror when they seek my advice, or invite me to spend time with them, or extend a helping hand. They tell me that I am silly, and worthy, and of value, and loveable even in the selfishness and woundedness.

These are the mirrors that Love provides me. These are the only mirrors that matter. Oh how grateful I am for pattering feet and sliding stools and mess making children. Today I will hug them tighter and accept their sweet kisses all over my face. Tonight I will not avert my eyes when my husband tells me I am everything he ever dreamed of. Here is to many more days of forgetting to peek in the mirror!

What mirrors do you have that show you your true beauty?

Happy Valentines day to you!

xoxo